'I’m starting to think it’s me...': Bride drops bridesmaid without an explanation 2 hours after the rehearsal dinner despite $600 gift

Author image for Sienna Varady
Sienna Varady
Dec 31, 2023 1:00 PM EST

I understand the desire to have the perfect wedding, but at what expense? When someone prioritizes the event itself over the people in attendance, it is extremely troubling. Don't you think?

The story below revolves around a bridesmaid who was unable to withstand the bride's insane demands and rage.  OP did everything in her power to meet the bride's wants and preferences. Unfortunately, however, after being unable to attend one of the several wedding festivities due to a variety of personal reasons (spouse, work, child, etc.), OP was abruptly and without warning excluded from the wedding. Basically, the bride ruined a friendship that had been going strong for years over one small (and trivial) mistake. To be honest, if I were in OP's position, I would be devastated and furious. But don't just take my word for it, scroll down to read the story below! And when you're done and want to finish on a happier note, have a look at some of the funniest relationship memes for thriving ladies working on their New Year resolutions here!

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  • 01
    "I'm starting to think it's me... I'm on the thicker side and 10 years older than the rest of the bridesmaids"
    via Canva
  • 02
    Bridesmaid to uninvited hours before the wedding
    via u/No_Tangerine2001
  • 03
    I was dropped as a bridesmaid just two hours after the rehearsal dinner. B and A, are my college friends. B asked me and A to be bridesmaids when B got engaged. We all became friends during nursing school and A&B graduated together
    via u/No_Tangerine2001
  • 04
    since they had to retake a class after our first semester together. I helped them study, invited them to my wedding when I got married and we were all happy for B. The trouble started when I couldn't make the rehearsal
    via u/No_Tangerine2001
  • 05
    walk through this afternoon due to being too tired after my overnight shift as a nurse ( it was 3rd day in a row) I texted B, apologizing, and confirmed I'd make it to the other festivities. A, also sick, couldn't attend the rehearsal walk or dinner. B
    via u/No_Tangerine2001
  • 06
    seemed okay with things. As I'm getting ready for the rehearsal dinner. B attitude shifted and intensified when she changed the schedule last minute for the wedding tomorrow making us arrive an hour early. I texted B
    via u/No_Tangerine2001
  • 07
    but she didn't reply, clarifying her text and the previous times. No reply, so I texted the MOH (her sister). The MOH gave me three options, I informed her my makeup appointment has us done at 11 but we won't make it
    via u/No_Tangerine2001
  • 08
    to the venue till after. The bride was now requesting us to be there at 11 ready since we missed the walk-through of the venue in the afternoon. The ceremony starts around 5, the bride had a mini rehearsal for 11:30 and wanted to
    via u/No_Tangerine2001
  • 09
    bridesmaids in the venue at 1030. I explained to the MOH that the bride previously agreed with me and A weeks ago to allow us to get there at noon. It was a very short notice for my MUA. The MOH gave me 3 options: have my make up done
    via u/No_Tangerine2001
  • 10
    at the parking lot, do my own make up, or don't come. She seemed cold so I wanted to clarify if me and A were welcome. She assured me we were but they're not going to accommodate the noon time the bride previously told us and
    via u/No_Tangerine2001
  • 11
    that we needed to be there by 11. I didn't reply to her text after that. Feeling pressured, I called the artist (initially she couldn't come that early because of her kiddos), she ended up making
    via u/No_Tangerine2001
  • 12
    arrangements to meetup earlier for me and A. I had this figured out before the rehearsal dinner which I attended with my husband, a hour later. I had one mini panic attack in the car but I pushed through and made it to the rehearsal dinner. During
    via u/No_Tangerine2001
  • 13
    dinner the bride never talked to me. Her mom welcomed me and when I went to say hi to the bride she gave a brief smile and turned back to her friend. Which was odd and made me nervous. She's usually very warm and welcoming. Later on, the MOH
    via u/No_Tangerine2001
  • 14
    was a bit cold with me and asked what I was going to do. I informed her I figured it out and I'm going to be there at 11. Things felt tense and my heart was breaking. Friend A couldn't make it because she was sick, and I felt bad not having her
    via u/No_Tangerine2001
  • 15
    there either. I made small talk with the table and got everyone to share their Netflix picks this week. The rehearsal dinner ended when the father made an announcements that those staying at the hotel a few blocks
    via u/No_Tangerine2001
  • 16
    down are welcome to mingle in the lobby for a few. Everyone got up fast and started leaving quickly. So me and my husband went home since our sitter time was limited and we lived 10 min away. When I got home I finished the brides hair extension order and put it in a
    via u/No_Tangerine2001
  • 17
    gift bag. She wanted a custom hair extensions for her wedding. She wanted the extensions as a gift in exchange she agreed to allow me to use a wedding photo to promote my business. I spent roughly 600$ finding the best hair extensions for her. I had to order 3 sets to find the
    via u/No_Tangerine2001
  • 18
    perfect match, for her and eventually I had to choose one set to custom dye. I package the gift and text the mother of the bride... no answer. A hour later, I texted the bride...no answer. The MOH texted right away. To inform me that I was
    via u/No_Tangerine2001
  • 19
    unwelcome tomorrow. and hurt. at the wedding I was shocked, sad, I don't know what I did wrong, A, B, and me all communicated in a group text. It seems like A is still invited, she's going to come over to have my MUA glam her
    via u/No_Tangerine2001
  • 20
    up and I'm going to be doing her hair. We think there's a chance A might get turned away at the door. Idk I'm confused, can someone point out what I did wrong? Location & Times: I got home at 10 am today, the venue is about
    via u/No_Tangerine2001
  • 21
    40 minutes away in a different town. They got a hotel in the city for their out of town guests. The hotel is really nice, upscale and there's more to see and do. The venue town doesn't have nice hotel options. The rehearsal was at 1pm I work overnight shifts that typically last 12-13 hours.
    via u/No_Tangerine2001
  • 22
    I'm new to nights so please take that into consideration especially if you work those shifts consecutively Uber For those who keep asking about Uber. I can't afford it at the moment. I had a big expense when my dog d d this
    via u/No_Tangerine2001
  • 23
    month. Nurse Job I'm new to working nights and it's really hard on your body to adjust. I've had an accident in the past because of sleep deprivation. I don't want de or hurt some one because of my sleep deprivation. Also I'm a new
    via u/No_Tangerine2001
  • 24
    grad, December was my transition period to nights with my preceptor. Very early on I was denied the day off. I asked my manager again and she agreed to allow me to have the day but was very stern in informing me that December we have black out dates and that I
    via u/No_Tangerine2001
  • 25
    will be working the day before the wedding to be fair, since I'm new nurse I'm not able to do my schedule period till I'm off orientation. I'm able to pick days this new schedule cycle Jan- February since I will be with out a perceptor and on my own
    via u/No_Tangerine2001
  • 26
    Rides Me and my husband work opposite schedules, my son is on school break as well he's 10. Finances I've spent a lot of money and time to be part of the wedding. Right now I'm financially tight with unexpected expenses like my dog pa ing away.
    via u/No_Tangerine2001
  • 27
    Update 1. A didn't get turn away. She sent me a text that B was excited and acting bubbly like nothing happened. She thinks it was probably MOH who influenced B. A thinks we could still talk things out. But I don't think so.... The damage is done.
    via u/No_Tangerine2001
  • 28
    Update 2. They had on the itinerary that rehearsal at 1130. A got there a little late maybe 1120 instead of 11. They said she fine and everyone was bubbly and happy. I'm starting to think it's me. I'm on the thicker side and 10 years older than the rest of the bridesmaid.
    via u/No_Tangerine2001
  • 29
    Maybe it's my insecurities. Every text I sent her was including me and A since we're getting everything done together and when the bride asked questions. Update 3. B is kinda OCD on something's. I know she wanted an even number of grooms and
    via u/No_Tangerine2001
  • 30
    brides. There's an even number now, I know that might have been a stressor. One of our friends from nursing decided not to go to the wedding and came over to cheer me up. I encouraged her to go but she
    via u/No_Tangerine2001
  • 31
    didn't like the way this went down and lost respect for B. Update 4. A boyfriend just texted me that my name is still on the guest list in the event.
    via u/No_Tangerine2001
  • 32
    soph_lurk_2018. 16 hr. ago NTA but you would be TA to yourself if you give her the hair extensions. Do not give them to her. Go no contact with the bride. Missing the
    via u/soph_lurk_2018
  • 33
    rehearsal walk through does not justify ignoring you at the dinner and kicking you out the day of the wedding. I would never speak to the bride again.
    via u/soph_lurk_2018
  • 34
    KimmyCeeAhh · 16 hr. ago Bride p sed away a long friendship because you couldn't rearrange your life to accommodate her wedding plans. Plus she made last minute changes to those
    via u/KimmyCeeAhh
  • 35
    plans & expected you to jump to her demands. NTA, but please don't give her those extensions. She doesn't deserve them.
    via u/KimmyCeeAhh
  • 36
    Livs6897-16 hr. ago My friend got married in the autumn. One of the bridesmaids: -missed the hen bc she said she couldn't afford it
    via u/Livs6897
  • 37
    -scheduled herself to work on set up/ rehearsal day so missed all of that -missed the rehearsal dinner/ drinks (see above)
    via u/Livs6897
  • 38
    -bought the wrong colour bridesmaid dress and had to wear it anyway bc we literally realised morning of And is still friends with the bride bc s t happens and your wedding isn't the centre of everyone else's life.
    via u/Livs6897
  • 39
    LibraryMouse4321. 15 hr. ago You better not have given her those extensions! You can sell them to someone else.
    via u/LibraryMouse4321
  • 40
    The bridezilla is a nasty person, and so is her MOH. Her MOH might be behind all the issues, might have influenced her, and also may have lied to both of you.
    via u/LibraryMouse4321
  • 41
    CrankyNurse68 · 17 hr. ago NTA. First of all who scheduled a rehearsal at 1 pm knowing you worked 14ish hours until 10 am? And why couldn't you just do a quick run thru at
    via u/CrankyNurse68
  • 42
    noon? This is not a freakin coronation. It's a wedding and things happen. Bridezilla needs to get over herself
    via u/CrankyNurse68

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